I have undertaken an experiment the past few days to learn a skill, a simple skill at that, listening. Listen with the whole body. wtf????? Tune in and present a blank slate to the adversary or your counter party which means offer your mind as a blank slate.
Try not to do too much at once,like defend your position and cook up replies to their position before they are done. I am keeping track of how many times in a conversation I am aware of my level of listening, mirroring and validation. Am I racing to respond, defend, correct, analyze or reply???? Or am I using an effective pause and using the simple technique of validation and the mirror. Note than I am not using NLP body language mirror and miming their every movement nor am I parroting each word they say.
I am drilling my listening skills as a foundation to build upon using the Voss Black Swan model. I am listening for and trying to tune into emotions or unspoken reservations.
Mirror and validate. See here voss negotiation.