Everyday Invalidations Gift Giving

I have to buy for every one so I got you this too.  Or I did not know what you wanted to here you go.  I see the above statements as double invalidations. First the gift giver internally invalidates themselves as being powerless in the situation the “have to” and “here you go” are dead give  a ways of trying to escape some form of responsibility.   And for the receiver of the gift there is that soft shit stinky kind of feeling that I sort of matter but not that much as well as look at the emotional anxiety and distress I put these people through.  I must be a bad person.  So even when gift giving or shopping there is underlying anger and victimization happening.  Gift giving is a loaded emo game of expectations and let downs and the ooze of emotional yuk and shame raining down.

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