A Thank You to A. Smith

After Aug 1976 the world came to a stand still sort of for a few weeks.  My father and younger brother had been killed in a terrible car accident.  I remained with my mom. No one knew what to do with me not to mention how to process their acute grief and shock at what had happened.  I was left to be taught, coached and mentored by a gaggle of grandfathers, uncles and cousins as a young boy.  What are we going to do with him? the question lingered.  Not sure he is different from us he is not technical.  He cannot build anything or do math nor does he enjoy pouring cement or physical labour.  Hmm, what to do?  From money to bikes to cars and jobs I got all I needed to know from Adrian Smith my mothers dad.  At times it was hectic and chaotic and mostly amusing.  It is a good thing that I have a good memory as there was a lot to take in.  My grandfather is dying as I write this and his moments may be numbered here with us.  He may leave us peacefully without struggle as the Alzheimers  takes over his functioning.  I am not like everyone else that needs pictures, videos and home movies to be melancholy.  I have a full slate of my own sound bites, and film clips that play continuous loops in my head.  Most of them funny LOL.  I wanted to say thank you for all that has been invested in me as my eyes start to tear now.  I hope that I did not let any one down by my foolish behavior and my mistakes over the years.  I still have a few years left in me yet to repent if need be.  Maybe the tears have been festering for years and they are surfacing as I write this due to the continuous investment in my development and maturity that has been freely given to me.

I think that the tears appear because I never thought that any one or group of people could invest that much love in a person over time unconditionally.  Lucky for me that I have come to, to realize what I had and what I still have.  Before I completely loose all faculties at this point in time I wanted to say thanks for the help and the guidance and all of the rest you have so freely given.  You will be missed terribly.

Sincerely,

Shawn James Draisey

September 17 1968

 

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